‘Falling’ is a piece of prose by Sumaiya, an avid writer from Bangladesh. Edited for clarity by Ista Kyra.
Amerie was surprised to realise that she had fallen in love.
It made her think of so many things in mere seconds. She never expected that she would ever fall in love.
Whenever she thought about falling in love, she usually concluded that she’d only go so far as to date someone, but not a committed relationship. It wasn’t a conscious decision, it just felt like a natural possibility for herself.
She had met quite a few boys who had liked her but none of them had had the courage to confess their feelings to her personally. They were intimidated by her fierce and nonchalant persona.
She knew how those boys felt but she didn’t reciprocate their feelings. In fact, she wasn’t entirely sure if she would ever experience that emotion called love.
But now, here she was, shocked that she had actually fallen for someone.
Although she had only recently noticed her feelings of love, she was sure it didn’t happen in that instant. She had been in love for some time now.
Her own personality did not let her acknowledge it. She’d say to herself that she didn’t, couldn’t. That it was impossible.
Afterall, it wasn’t about casually liking someone, this was about love.
She knew he was not someone she should like,on account of their different approaches to life. Yet, she had fallen for him and she accepted it as she felt like she could not disown her feelings anyway.
But Amerie decided she would not talk about her feelings to anyone, least of all, to the one she loves.
She was scared. She didn’t want it to be seen as her weakness and she was afraid of being vulnerable. She couldn’t stand to be seen that way.
She also wasn’t sure if he felt the same way, especially since, they were not a completely perfect match.
So she tried to put the idea out of her mind. There was nothing to discuss about it. Whatever she felt would remain as it were, to herself, for life. Just like all her other emotional weaknesses.
She wondered how she could love him and still, can’t love him at the same time!